A Very Belated response to my review of Star Trek (and my life in general)
This email was provided a few months back by a good friend of mine (now in the marines). He made me promise to publish it so that the world could see a class-A rebuttal. For those curious what he’s responding to (primarily my views on france, dell.com’s marketing to women, and the star trek film) , see the previous entries section of this blog. Anyway, here it is:
Dear Woody,
I don’t have time to do a point-by-point, but i guess i’ll make an exception for duty’s sake:
+France is a place of hippies and liberals, and, worst of all, the French. To like the country is to prove your place among this circus-sideshow of social criminals, or perhaps to unviel your true nature as one of the fabled Frenhipiberals, a dreaded hybrid who’s ability to debauch sacred American morality is matched only in power by its van-cloistered, pot-drenched and cheese-laden body odour.
+Women should pay more for laptops. Period. Sure, every few years the Frenhipiberals pour a honey potion in mens’ ears and drag this old complaint up, but every time they do the old logic stands firm: 1-people with electronic anonymity complain… a lot. 2- women complain… a whole hell of a lot, and when they do my dinner is left cold. If we didn’t charge more for women to have access to computers, how would men be able to financially support our society’s basic infrastructure? The vagina is really just a series of tubes; imagine the internet on it’s period.
That’s not just ugly, it’s un-American. ‘nough said.
+America loved the new Star Trek movie. And as a Frenhipiberal, i can’t expect your opinion to be anywhere near correct. More telling is your use of the term “blaster fire” marking you as worse than the average freedom-hating cheesemonkey. You sir are a Star Wars fan, and as a point of fact your slander of this new movie, now being hailed as “the New New Testament”, is as a spit-bubble on the lip of a retarded chimp.
In summation:
Go America, France Sucks, Women should be more respectful of the right to bear my sons… er pay more for computers, and the new Star Trek Movie is awesome!
Oh yeah, and be safe, i don’t know if you’ve seen Taken yet, but people as pretty as us should be careful in France.
see ya state side,
A